"Love" & "Hate" Are Terrifying in 'Until I Kill You'

BritBox’s newest true crime series, Until I Kill You, is a harrowing and terrifying drama. Adapted by Nick Stevens (The Pembrokeshire Murders) from Delia Balmer’s book Living With a Serial Killer and directed by Julia Ford (The Bay), the series chronicles Balmer’s years-long journey encountering a psychopath who almost killed her and her fury at the legal system which allowed him to escape justice in two countries for so long. 

Anna Maxwell Martin (Line of Duty) gives a brilliant performance as Balmer, who is not an easy woman to like or understand. Eccentric, opinionated, and arrogant, she swoops through London’s rush hour traffic on her bicycle without a helmet to the annoyance of traffic police. She doesn’t quite fit in anywhere, with an accent peppered with American and Canadian pronunciations and ties to Australia and Scotland. An agency nurse, Delia lives and travels light, ready to take a trip to bask in the sun and heat whenever it suits her. Except for Leah (Amanda Wilkin), her colleagues at Westminster Hospital mostly ignore or laugh at her.

As she tells the handsome young carpenter she meets in a pub, she’s a traveler, not a tourist. He admires her dancing, recognizes her as a free spirit, and shares her love of travel. His name is John Sweeney (Shaun Evans), all sexy and scruffy charm, accepting her invite to her place immediately. He is younger, 34 to Delia’s 40, and seems somewhat bewildered at her lack of furniture in a fabric-draped apartment. She serves tea on the rug, annoyed when he knocks over his mug and asks him to leave. However, the following day, she starts feeling concerned about her rudeness and writes him a letter of apology, which she presents to him at the pub. This time, his pet tarantula doesn’t even put her off, as they fall into bed.

John reels Delia in, building her trust, and immediately accepts her invitation to move in with her. He invites her to Christmas with his family, where his attitude toward her changes, talking down and shaming her. Delia is shocked to hear from a stranger that John was married before and has two children. She is outraged; he tells her not to nag him. Overriding Delia’s aversion to furniture, John builds a bed, and she’s scared when, one night, he attempts to strangle her in his sleep. 

From there, the story starts to flash forward; suddenly, it’s been a year with Delia still at Westminster Hospital, still only friends with Leah. Delia confesses that things are not going well. John is disrespectful, and she’s beginning to be afraid of him. Leah, a previous victim of domestic violence, urges Delia to change the locks. But that night, unexpectedly, John is home and cooking dinner and has bought her a heart-shaped pincushion as a gift. She asks him to leave, and he agrees he will... after dinner. Then, he asks if he can draw her, showing off past drawings of his previous girlfriend, Melissa. 

However, Delia’s drawing is an ugly caricature, so after he goes to the pub, Delia opens his portfolio to find a stylized sketch of a naked woman without a head, feet, or hands. When he returns, she confronts him, only for him to shout at her that, yes, it’s Melissa. He killed her, chopped her up, and threw her into a canal.

When Delia finally escapes John's apartment days later, Leah refers her to a women’s refuge, which leads to the police, where she talks to DS Andy Collins (Steve Edge) and DC Patrick Flynn (Matthew Aubrey). She tells them John tied her to the bed from Friday evening to Tuesday morning, frequently raping her at knife-point. She is blunt, unafraid, and explicit. Ludicrously, they ask if she consented. John has left the apartment, and the police aren’t interested in his drawings, although Officer Jane Barker (Lucy Thackeray) suggests they may be evidence. The police warn Delia that they don’t have the resources to protect her, other than occasional patrol car drive-by visits. Finally, Delia agrees to change the locks.

Six months later, Delia and Leah make contact again, only for John to burst out of the bathroom when they arrive, threatening to kill her. Leah calls the police, and John is arrested. He’ll be charged for grievous bodily harm, and false imprisonment, and the police know he has a history of violence. At the squat, they discover a bag of equipment, including ropes, rubber gloves, and a saw.

Around this time in Amsterdam, police officer Astrid De Vries (Sallie Harmsen) informs Inspector Stilma (William Brand) that John Sweeney came up on the radar when he claimed that he’d murdered and mutilated his girlfriend Melissa in Amsterdam. Three years ago, a woman’s body, minus her head, hands, and feet, was discovered in a suitcase in a canal. Melissa’s father, Jack Halstead (Mitchell Mullen), frustrated by not knowing what happened to his daughter, travels to Amsterdam and shortly after is requested to provide a sample for a DNA profile. But to the disappointment of the Halstead family, and the London and Amsterdam police, there is no match.

Delia’s plans to visit the US are stalled since she’s a key witness in John’s upcoming trial, but worse news is to come. John and other prisoners are being released on bail to spend Christmas with his family. She’s assured he won’t break bail. Delia calls her brother, Stewart (Cory Balmer), to let him and her parents know she won’t be visiting or available for phone calls at Christmas. They both cry as they remember her last visit home.

Delia returns home from work and is brutally attacked by John on the doorstep with an ax and a knife. Her neighbors save her, but she is severely injured, going into cardiac arrest in the ambulance, followed by six hours of surgery, multiple blood transfusions, and a stay in the ICU. This, Delia says, was the night John killed her. With WPC Jane Barker appointed her family liaison, Delia begins her long physical recovery, leaving the hospital to stay in a secure refuge. Sadly, Leah and her partner have decided to move out of London to Exeter.

John has disappeared, although he sends the police a mocking postcard from Berlin. He returns to England under a false name and moves into a flat in London. A woman, Paula Edwards (Debbie Brannan), knocks at his door one night, clearly with the wrong address, and he invites her in for a cup of tea. She won’t be seen alive again.

Until I Kill You continues with the second half/final two episodes streaming on BritBox on Friday, November 8, 2024.